Hahahhahaha! Oooh get it! Ugh I am so dead but if I go to the lib whuich I will hopefully b havung sex instead, ill hit u up
Its trashy in the best of ways. Like a stripper working to pay for college.
I just heard someone say "gosh-darnit" and they didn't have a southern twang. I worry for New York.
She's yelling about threesomes and realllly wants you to come over. Put the pieces together.
He just keeps repeating "this isn't my bagel".. i'm worried for his safety
You want anything?
Gatorade and you naked.
Its a little weird going to a wedding where I've screwed the bride and my wife has screwed the groom. Great wedding though.
Just rolled up a joint with a cop standing right beside me. He just told us to not leave behind any garbage or empties. God I love canadian camping
I am trying to take a picture of a man in a wheelchair trying to ship a michael jackson portrait
I don't care what you say, the fact that he's a drag queen with the same shoe size as me is reason enough to date him
so she gave me back a bag of clothing, had some boxers in it...they werent mine.... well that sums up 5 years of my life
If there is a heaven, that's what it will be. Bagel Bites and cunnilingus.
Consider yourself lucky. If I ever run into my ex, all I'll be able to think is, "I let you pee on me and lead me around on a leash."
I found condoms in the back yard from you and your boyfriend. My house isnt a motel
Man the amount of drugs being done at a wedding with a bunch of surgeons was disturbing
Randomize
