make sure i look cute passed out on the couch.
Found a joint walking to class. I feel like the environment is rewarding me for being green.
All four of us managed to throw up in the same bathroom at different times during the night. I think we'll get along great living together.
honestly i just want a cigarette and someone to go down on me... are you interested in helping with either of those
No. I just want to cuddle and talk about our feeling. Of course this a booty call.
Really? I thought your parents stopped loving you when you drunkenly fell through the ceiling...
He's rescued me passed out naked on the playground next door and I've rescued him passed out naked in the middle of campus. That's why we're a great couple.
he stopped talking to me, quit his job, moved out of the province and then told me it was "no big" when I called him apologizing...
I told him that if he cleaned the bathroom, I'd blow him. You could eat off the toilet. Seriously, get over here. This is the cleanest you'll ever see it.
Over 14,000 people at my school and the kid I went home with last night is IN MY FUCKING LECTURE
And thanks for putting me in that safety position on the bathroom floor while I was spooning the toilet
What color nail polish screams, "Either fuck me or get the hell out of my way"?
The dentist walked in on me trying to bottle some laughing gas to take home with me. That high.
I feel really sorry for my toilet right now
Last night was a bad idea. I'm hungover and the contents of my purse smell like Korean BBQ.
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