What do you say about some mid-afternoon anal?
This is why I'm not putting my name in lights over your bed.
just did the walk of shame by his grandma. what the fuck is an old lady doing up at six am?
The more I throw up, the more I am remembering exactly what I drank last night...in order.
What happened to him?
He was walking right behind us then disappeared.. turns out he checked his luggage at a night club, continued to drink and dance, then slept on the 4th floor of some museum
I dont think she was a real nurse but she was good at it. wish I rememebrd her name
how many past hook-ups can i invite to go bar hopping with me for my b-day before it becomes a bad idea?
Oh god the guy I took underwear from at the bar is trying to add me as a friend on facebook now.
All is not lost. The bondage chair came with repair seals and glue. It's like the knewwwwwww this would happen.
We've reached the point in our fuck buddy relationship where we are playing words with friends. This is too intimate.
I dunno what the deal was, but you spent about an hour trying to put your phone charger in the outlet and you were yelling "one plug to rule them all"
I WANNA SUCK HIS DICK ON A BOAT
Hey, remember that time a week ago when we walk-of-shamed literally down the Vegas Strip at 8:45am and I had one broken heel?
I'm literally watching a webcam of the Vegas strip right now and it is making me sad.
We met behind our asshole boss's back with the intent to oust him from the company. If this revolution is a success, bring nachoes.
Randomize
