She thinks she is all that and a bag of skittles but I'm definitely not tasting the rainbow...
So I'm going back to my apartment just to get my vibrator.
I thought you were moving in with your boyfriend for the summer?
Well....one will keep me from having to pay rent and the other satisfies. I'll let you figure it out.
anyone who buys me chipotle gets an automatic hj
The parties out here are fucking awesome and I've got the grades to prove it.
He had a seizure when i was giving him head. for a second i was thinking i was doing a spectacular job
MY DOG FOUND A BAG OF COKE ON THE SIDE OF THE ROAD!!!!!!!!!!!
AND ITS GOOD STUFF TOO!!!!!! AHHH!!!!!!
so, does the "dick the size of your forearm" thing run in the family then?
I'm so hungover all I can do is stare at my curser and hope it starts moving on its own
I immediately knew he was tripping, he came over with a grocery bag of snow balls and a bike helmet on and asked if I was prepared to die for my country.
Currently putting together my outfit for this weekend, AKA a poster board that says "I'll cook you breakfast and do all your laundry, take me home." On front and back
Worse than that. I caught my roommate jerking off to a topless stripper in gta 5.
You were a cyclone of alcohol and bad decisions - like a gay Tazmanian devil
I love my cat. she doesnt judge when i stumble in my house drunk and pass out on my floor. my dog looks at me disappointed.
Just don’t be like me and break up between Christmas and NYE and then get blackout on NYE and puke in your undies.
Its like my group of friends and I are all dating and we're all just a bunch of Swingers, is that normal?
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