honestly, who buys weed with an unemployment check?
you.
oh yeah. preciate
You know how I know he's a virgin? He's wearing transition lenses.
I just farted. And everybody around me is looking at the fat girl to my left. I win.
He talked me into making a sex video, no worries though, I was wearing sunglasses.
Blood. All over. Pre coke adventure needs to slow down unless I'm involved
IDK who she called, but some guy came into the party, flying drop kicked Joe said never again. She has to invite him around again.
I'm making myself a nametag with my contact info and pinning it to myself like a kindergardenter in case I get lost when I black out on Sat.
Can we laminate it? Just to be safe.
Dude if it is ever said "everybody get inside the police helicopter just showed up.". That means it was a successful party.
He better not be in your backpack
I asked you if you wanted to go to the ER, have me sew it up or just wrap it in duct tape and keep on keepin on. You just said YES. I remember very little after that.
You're a good friend.
So I can confidently say that I'm the only 3rd year engineering student who completed all 4 of their exams with One Direction pens
Tent sex on an air mattress requires balance and flexibility. Not for the faint of heart
OMG he dropped his pants for me. Granted it was to show me where he got stabbed but still...
Correction: *I* watched JoJo's Bizarre adventure while he snored asleep on me cock still fully inside me.
Don't forget to grab a pregnancy test and sloppy joe mix for tonight
Randomize
