The guatemalans kept making all these sexual suggestions ... With the corn
She texted her brother about how much she loved his hot tub. He responded three days later that he wasn't aware he owned a hot tub.
i don't know what happened by from the looks of her lipstick I'd say she was skull fucked by a rhino
Maybe it's the vicodin, but all I wanna do is hunt wild hogs.
He's going to let me keep his bowl in my car. Does that make us Facebook official?
I've been told that their best stripper is on maternity leave. NEVER AGAIN.
It's like some sort of initiation to finger one of them... so I did it. And got high fived afterwards like a dozen times.
Those were right hand only?
do you remember showing me a picture of your husbands penis last night?
yea! the mushroom one. i would only show you.
Is she okay?
She may want to issue revenge punches, but medically fine.
Man I can't wait till Thursday if strippers and beer are what you consider "research"
It's beautiful and huge. Like a dinosaur.
If I'm legally allowed to go to jail than I should legally be allowed to tell a cop to fuck off. Basic principles.
Yea, but did you really have to throw a sandwich at him??
I was totally going to fuck him and then his friend walked in brushing his teeth, whipped down his pants and started doing the windmill. Ultimate cock block
i gotta say this to some one...... my penis feels sooooooooo sooooooft, its amazing
like for real, sooooooooooooooo smoooooooooooooth its amazing
I can't wait for you to read this text tomorrow
Seriously though, I walked in and he was holding my cat in the air singing "the circle of life"...
Randomize
