I just told my doc I would like to talk about my drinking problem, but that it would probably get in the way of my weekend plans.
The problem is he wears abercrombie jeans like there's nothing wrong with it
the only reason why im excited to go home for break is to finally eat real fucking food and have normal bowel movements.
No.. It's totally over.. He deleted the poke I sent him.. That makes it official.
someone wrote "the short drunk lives here" on our door. i already have a reputation
I Never golf you the sypdu of andrew. The one o will marry. The one j plwgded my last breath up. The one I pledged everything I live forbworh to. I love him more than life itself
My summer fucks are coming back to haunt me with a vengeance.
Just write off about 10000+ brain cells and 6 months of your lifespan.
Sounds like a normal friday night
she asked me where ive been her entire life and the guy in the room next to us yelled "with other women bitch!"
He stopped responding after the animal pictures... I do this EVERY TIME.
Going through Bojangles drive thru chanting "KFC" hammered at 8:00 was the highlight.
I need a "no soliciting" sign for your dick
Why were u walkin around mc with a toilet bowl lid handcuffed to u and carrying a stuffed Teddy bear last night?
WHAT THE FUCK DREAM ME
I'M GONNA PUNCH THAT BITCH THE FUCK DID SHE THINK SHE WAS DOIN
we have beer and we're watching the birds have sex in our yard.
Randomize