ugh.. my birth control just came out of my nose. wtf?
I was totally going to sleep with him, until he got naked and started swinging around his boner singing "I'm so hard. oh yeah yeah yeah, I'm so hard" like Rihanna.
Ya well my good-girl image was pretty much blown when he found out I'm going to jail soon.
They just caught the deck on fire and I ran out with cups off the beer pong table filled with water from the toilet. It was the closest water source.
Fun thought: I realized the thing I miss most about him is dixie kong's double trouble on his super Nintendo. It's possible that I don't have a soul.
I STILL HAVE A HARD TIME DECIDING WHAT TO WEAR IN THE MORNING HOW WOULD IT BE POSSIBLE FOR ME TO PICK A PAIR OF PANTS AND GO OH ILL JUST WEAR THESE FOR THE REST OF MY LIFE
NEW HOUSE RULE! If you make it in a chicks cleavage it's 3 cups and bra off.
BP at your house from now on.
How bout we save the 40s for when we FINISH the project this time..
Being sober is no fun. Karaoke and not wearing pants are not socially acceptable things to do anymore and this depresses me.
How do you ask the man who gives you multiple orgasms if he has friends who could do the same for your friend?
Like, I don't need to know your life dude. I just need you to suck my tits.
Shit facedness and cuddling are what you have to look forward to this evening.
I just had mom give me advice about how and where to store my lube in my shower. It was super awkward. Of course, she also walked in on me masturbating once so I guess turnabout is fair play
How do you say "put it in me" in Spanish... I'm dealing with language barriers here.
It's magical, I'm just dancing. It's like prom but by myself and with less clothes.
Randomize
