Okay, I have a threesome with foreigners and suddenly I'm a man-whore
there's a guy on campus handing out business cards. you pay him to see if your girlfriend will cheat. the company name is "tying up loose ends"
Based on how hungover I feel today, it makes more sense that the bouncer didn't let me in to that bar.
I went to the gas station and the lady goes I remember you. Broken sunglasses and puke on your car.
I am planning my day around naps and lesbians.
Walk of Shame'd halfway down a mountain, skiiers passing. Do not drink with lifties at the end of ski season.
Dude, they are shaking the RV, yell at them. It feels like i'm being rocked to sleep, I don't like it, I'm not a baby.
She just rubbed her face up and down my six pack cooing. Equal measure of weird and hot.
I tried to pay my tab and go home but she wrote me a "list of things I'm good at" with fellatio as no 1...
My fall semester strategy is to submit my papers with a nude selfie
You've got post-grad studies written all over you
Random one night stand with a guy that had a USA tattoo on his ass. Can't possibly get more American than that
It was really strange. I feel like I had sex with a synchronized swimmer.
Fyi - we're going to be eating those sandwiches in bed when you get home.
For a girl who cried from fear the last time she was asked out, this. Is. TERRIFYING!
I hate to be the bearer of bad news, but yours is no longer the biggest penis I've seen. It is however, still the prettiest.
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