Nick had a break down & said to me "Everybody's mad at me, I'm the douchebag, Im the fucking douchebag that everyone hates, Do you wanna come home with this douchebag?!"
You're going home with him aren't you?
I'll see ya in the morning when I leave his house
home. puking in laundry basket.
out of nowhere you said let us see your boobs, then proceeded to pull my shirt down.
i gets down
there should be laws that require people like to me to be on birth control.
she's sitting alone using her breathalyzer as a kazoo. help.
The moment you realize you should grow up: you're snorting your fathers percocet script with your old health insurance card, while your parents are on a 10 day cruise in the carribean...
I'm gonna fingerblast you when you get off work. Get ready.
That man gives me hope. I can't help it. And by "hope" I mean "wood."
the last thing i remember was the norwegian kid tacking a bag of wine to the ceiling, then boom! shower drain.
I'm a bit offended I got no nudies back but it's whatever
They're in the mail. Snapchats too fast. I want the suspense.
I banged a guy named Robbie last night and in the middle of sex he begged me to scream santos. I'm pretty sure I just screwed a dude with multiple personalities.
do you remember yelling out "insecurity makes my pussy dry!" unnecessarily loud at the bar?
Wtf. So apparently this 5 star establishment doesn't allow strip putt putt in the parking lot. We all just got kicked out of our rooms.
I know how to kill a man with nutmeg and a sword. You in?
Or nah
I haven’t sent any nudes yet in 2018.
That’s not true...is it?
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