I look better un-naked...
Princeton has an emergency contraception worldwide website. It is in moments like these that I love my university
after the cops left he pulled the weed out of his ass and we smoked it
My face is bruised from laying on the concrete. NO MORE VODKA!
yes, we have a friends with benefits thing. i found out he had never 69'd, done anal or had a threesome. i told him i was going to rock his world.
and what did he say?
there were no words. he looked like a kid on christmas morning.
He used my blackberry to make a voice recording of me orgasming, then set it as my ringtone while I was sleeping. I discovered this during a staff meeting this morning.
I'm customer of the month for a 3rd time now at the Wine store. I've achieved so much in my life
No its cool I don't even have to do anything he is rapping to one of the strippers. He is punishing himself enough.
I'm gonna give him birthday punches. On the dick. With my mouth.
As the bouncer was escorting you out, you yelled "keep your filthy dick beaters off me!"
please come back they are interrogating me about masturbation
He said the main reason he fucked me was cause of my storm trooper tattoo. IT ATTRACHES ALL THE HOT NERDS
I thought since you asked to see my dick I might as well say hi
Wtf can everyone stop fucking in my grandma's bed? This is like the third time
Want to sleep. Also want to see Alex on MDMA doing really stupid shit. Choices...
Randomize
