Ok walking to car, 3 gay guys park get out of car, one on phone says 'I dont know but I was definately getting some curb rubbing'
ya i vaguely remember microwaving a whole package of bacon for 20 minutes or so and then eating it all around 4am
At my internship. I get drug tested tmr at 2
Are they going to pay you for the one day you worked?
That's what happens when you park you car under a perfectly good balchony I can puke off of
Yeah but the gay hasidics turned out to actually just be real gay hasidics
She sat on the stairs and yelled sex positions at us. I don't remember if we went along with it but judging by the beer and condoms I'm thinking yes.
my roommate is sobbing and looking at photos of elephants. i'm so confused.
The maid moved your bed and found almost 40 used condoms and wrappers. She just looks at me and says "Dave?"
Actually here it's more "lie around naked in a dark room" weather.
I mean if you can't appreciate a good looking dick then just get out.
Did you put Adderal in the fishtank in the lobby? The fish are acting like Olympic sprinters. Asshole.
God I need to hump something, right now.
You are telling me my dick tastes like a taco supreme?
I'm saying this "taco supreme" tastes like your dick.
i just woke up from a 4 hour nap, still drunk, to make mac n cheese.
Just bought 2 liters of wine and frozen waffles for dinner. Is this 30?
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