Just got yelled at by a priest...again.
Hey, what are you up to?
Drinking wine with the guys and watching 7 Pounds.
Looking back I guess I could have changed that to beer and Die Hard.
This isn't the rejection hotline, is it?
i decided i am going on the Justin Bobby plan for success. Don't cut my hair for a year, don't shave for a month, land Audrina Patridge. Game on.
great idea involving lots of fake blood and face paint, call me tomorrow.
Seriously! We need to take her a thank you note or something. She puts up with the drugs and the extremely loud sex. She deserves a thank you card.
You need to braveheart it on Monday. Blue face paint and a loin cloth screaming freedom in your front yard.
Just to an Octoberfest and a sex party. Nothing wild.
It's fun yes. But hard on the body. I woke up with her purse, socks and one of her shoes in my room. The other shoe was outside. What the fuck were we doing last night?
Your fuck buddy is making you watch the OC. I think that counts as strings attached.
Thanks for your faith in my ability to stay sober while writing final essays. It's...unearned.
I want you to know I am at work super hungover and I threw up in the mop sink. I feel like you will appreciate this
You're my fucking hero
Having to do the walk of shame on crutches was defiently a first for me. cheers to the governor, klove
Just don’t be like me and break up between Christmas and NYE and then get blackout on NYE and puke in your undies.
Do I masturbate or eat a pound of matazah. Alissa help what do I do??
Randomize
