I have no memory of puking on someone. Was he cute?
I dont think problem is the right word. Problems arent something you enjoy. Life would be too boring without gambling.
Watching Blossom reruns on YouTube. Eating Pringles dipped in hot chocolate. Not taking this breakup well.
Am I texting you while being used as a stripper pole by two half-naked women? hint: I am.
No no I got the black eyes when I tried to do a flip off the second deck of a pontoon boat. Actually when I did a flip, it was a success.
this is what happens when you pick a roommate a year in advance.. she ends up hating you for hooking up with for of her extended family members
The maintenance guy says happy birthday. Also, he likes your penis balloon.
Dropping the entire last roll of TP into the toilet is a hurt you don't want to know.
I told him i turn boys gay hoping that would scare him off. Finally i found a way to take advantage of my disability.
After I came she just held my balls until I fell asleep. It was like adult swaddling. Magical...
She only fucks to metal. I don't know whether to marry her or run for the hills.
He doesn't deserve you. Your ass looks 8 times better than his face ever will. Wanna order pizza and watch porn?
Next time you have him paint you an outfit so you can do you walk the street naked TAKE A SHOWER BEFORE YOU GET IN THE BED. MY sheets look like like an acid trip
he made that chewbacca noise when he came. like father like son i guess.
Also your Swedish friend who's name I don't remember is really good in bed.
*Norwegian
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