I slayed a troll last night at BC guess i thought i was back in college
like i told you yesterday: virgins, blood, my name. do it.
i just hope all the shady shit stops so i can let him into my pants
Just to clear things up. I did not walk in on him jacking off to your facebook profile.
If I won't even leave the house for sex tonight. I definetly not going out for anything else.
Apparently while trying to get up from vomiting in the toilet I grabbed the seat cover for leverage and smashed my own head between it and the bowl. I don't remember this.
New brilliant plan: invite two random okcupid girls to the same bar at the same time, have them compete
it wasn't a total waste of time; I mean how often do you get to play scotch pong?
.....fair enough
He said he wanted to sit next to the fountain so he could "watch the water hit the other water".
I stopped him mid keg stand to show him how cute my bra was...
I don't remember much, but I remember he called me the dick whisperer, so it must not have been all bad.
I'm going to be such a slut in Europe I've already decided
Send me dick pics. We'll make a scrap book
i had fun fun last night, with the exception of you running over my foot with your car. makes a great story for my first one night stand.
Broken heels while double fisting margaritas, picking up shirtless, bloody men and escorting them out of harms way, the meltdown when I realized I can go without a bra bc my boobs shrunk, the morning vodka red bull you were forced to drink? Which one roped you in?
I woke up at 6:30 in the morning on the A train on 14th street. You wouldn't know anything about that right?
Randomize
