no, he came in my armpit
just went home with some hot chick. she has posters of the jonas brothers in her room. i basically ran out of the house.
We are like the golden girls with less cheesecake and more drugs.
Well, let's be honest here. You're dealing with gay guys... EVERYTHING has an emotional attachment.
She just pulled out a chicken strip and a hundred dollar bill from her purse. This is a legit twentyfirst bday weekend.
She set fire to my carpet trying to power-dry puke covered cigs with Josh's blowtorch. How she found it in the garage is beyond me but if you bring her with you again I'll shoot you myself.
I opened my eyes this morning, looked at the sunlight and made this hangover my bitch.
The strip clubs here are like a safari of penis, and I'm gonna bag me a rhino.
Can you bring home bongs? Like all the bongs. I need bongs
Just for once I'd like my first interaction with a new GP to not be an obvious sex injury.
Quickly hiding the condom wrappers, ropes, and handcuffs right before the parents arrive to help with moving out? Priceless.
I don't care. We're going to fuck. And I WONT apologize in the morning. You cheated on me, so you can cheat on her with me.
Just got drunk at the Cheesecake Factory again. Made me think of you.
That's the nicest thing anyone's ever said to me.
ok morning sex is a totally valid reason to come in late... ur good, cya in 20
I wiped my ass with a McDonalds wrapper. I've hit an all time low. Sorry for my impatience
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