you just kept yelling NO BUENO SENOR at the cashier and throwing coins at him, of course you were going to get kicked out of the grocery store
when I sang my humps to you I meant it.
Obviously he considers you not fucking him as fucking up. Thus making him fuck up. Based on this I believe he should be disqualified from the race to your vagina.
I decided staying home, watching porn and masterbating was a much better choice than the gym. And I was right.
They just keep looking funny at me. No one has attempted to tell me that I don't make sense though so maybe they're all way more high than I am.
Last night I dressed up as a cowgirl and walked into McDonald's. I bought 20 mcribs. There's pictures
Still no second date. Guess you shouldn't show guys your taser on the first date.
When he pulled it out last night I asked if that was as hard as it was going to get. I think I may have offended him.
Meet at Walmart straight from work to buy items for hurricane fun. Then blast some wine, make some sex, blast a bowl and cuddle each other till the sun comes up?
That's the most romantic New Orleans hurrication I've ever heard of. Can I have your babies?
And then he said, "let's have sex and I'll send you home with enchiladas."
The fact that we all screamed by Felicia to a bitch actually named Felicia will be a highlight of my life
I just wrote my resume on the same park bench I got felt up at in freshman year of highschool... I've truly come full circle
Drake has all the answers
I had sex with a boy who lives in a closet, that's like having sex with Harry Potter, right?
You should not be involved with someone who smells like that. Because that smell seriously does not go away. Even if you can't actually smell it at any given point, it will still haunt you
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