1. Call me if you need ANYTHING. 2. If you get tag teamed, I want details.
I hope you fall in a pool of honey in an immensely populated region of bears.
I used the word aforementioned in my paper. That's an automatic A in community college.
We ran out of things to say while we were playing Never Have I Ever so we started playing I Have Done This... Have You?
And why did 3 people fail to stop me from literally getting a piggy back ride from the bar to his apartment?!
Besides asking our teacher if he enjoyed being fisted did I have any other tragic moments last night?
The only responsible thing ive done in vegas is shower and that was onky to clean vomit off me
What is this nonsense on the table
Your idea.
I mean the hole taco that was chewed up and spit out
I feel like he has a double life, why was he walking around at 3 am with a backpack?
And the view of you in reverse cowgirl is arguably the most spectacular view ever... And I've seen the Eiffle tower, the colosseum, mountains of Hawaii, Michaelangelo's David, and the Mona Goddamn Lisa. Just saying.
You dove at him but passed out mid dive. Shame it wasnt a costume party your superman suit wouldve been clutch in the situation
my extended weekend of being as irresponsible as possible started with blowing the bartender in the bar bathroom. off to a good start.
its like i just tried to scrub the hangover off of me.
Where can I buy a stripper pole at midnight on a Sunday?
Nothing personal but yes I would be suspicious If I saw 3 guys and 2 girls in the same bathroom stall together
Randomize
