he was fingering the outside of my pants..i knew that was my cue to leave
whenever I think of his sister, I just picture a chick with a huge beard
he aplogized for the shitty sex and called me "ma'am" when he did it. And he wants redemption sex. Gah I love southern gentlemen.
We can't have sex anymore. The amount of money I've spent on meds and copays for UTIs is getting ridiculous
why the fuck would he compare you to sexy aquatic creatures?
hes like the used car salesman of hook ups and closed the deal w my taking him home with me,as is,today
I'm sorry I murdered your sperm with my alcohol saturated Olympic uterus.
Judge me all you want, but while you are stuck at home eating Ramen and tap water, I will be dining with some guy who, although might be the same age as my father, is filthy rich.
Is eating fries while lying on the floor bad for you?
If I choke and die at least I will have been doing something I love
I truly just stopped puking in my 730 am calculus class, looked up, corrected my professor, then resumed puking my eyes out. He was both impressed and disgusted.
Whenever I'm not in the mood and don't want to go to bed swampy, I just strategically suck him off during the second period intermission of the Cup playoffs and he leaves me alone and does the dishes. It's a win-win.
The walk home lasted longer than the sex. He lives in the flat above the bar.
If she's over 40, she won't believe you if you say " I'm only going to put the head in"
Dude get over here. Steven brought super soakers filled with colored vodka.
Add tweezing eyebrows to the list of things not to do while on adderol....
Randomize
