i hope S**** or M***** or someone took note of the fact that i was drinking popov like water and could no longer form sentences. i mean, dont get me wrong i had been thinking about boning R*** long before my sobriety left the picture but the number of reasons not to, outweighed the temptation and without sir robert burnett as R***'s wingman, it would have never happened
i just walked passed a table of guys by myself.. they looked @ me talked and then yelled 7
id pin you as more of an 8
I will fuck a handful of worms if you hold them
so I have this game called 14 beers left. and we both have to drink 7 before we leave
He's the biggest piece of shit to ever exist. He's not even wearing shoes.
Tbell employee was shuffling through my bag, calling off each item i ordered to make sure it was all there. I stopped him halfway through with "guy, don't worry, I'm high as shit, I'll eat anything."
When did we start counting Thursdays as weekends?
When we got our fake ids in grade 11, why?
I just feel like it's time to start counting wednesdays as well...
They had to restock the bar 3 times before midnight. There is a bridesmaid dress hanging in a tree outside.
It was actually pretty good. His cock is as fat as the rest of him and I took out my contacts so I couldn't see him clearly.
For her birthday she wants to, " try something different with our butts a funnel and a bottle of whiskey"
Well at least it wasn't the first time I threw up out of a second story window
His balls are like really small, like dog sized balls. It was a weird discovery. Ever done a guy with dog sized balls?
I bruised my dick hopping over that fence last night
The moment I was petting the giraffe was the moment I passed out
I think I just got suckerpunched by a 14-year-old.
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