I used to have a blog that was basically all about ****** and all of his sexual misadventures
I mean it made tucker max look like a fucking alterboy
But unfortunatley his mom did a google search and found it
Best walk of shame ever - Brown Hennesy shirt, bright blue overly large basketball shorts, stilettos from night before - ended up buying a ton of 40's and a 30 pack of coors.
Where are you?
A place I should not be.
let's bang
You're in my phone as 'Weird Bus Guy' so I think my answer's no.
i just remebered what i did last night, i asked a homeless man on a bike "hey whatcha doin with that bike, wanna make 5 bucks?" he agreed and then rode me on his handle bars a block away to the next bar.
dude i just made a burrito by wrapping 2 packs of scooby snacks with a fruit roll up. im so high
I'm stoned in an empty parking lot listening to dave matthews while looking for a lighter.... I feel like I sent this 7 years ago.
he was writing an apology letter to his liver in shakespearean english... That much fun...
I was on my way at Dorito Smoothie
his dick makes me think maybe a monogamous relationship forever is possible.
Sorry I dragged you across a parking lot
I may be bringing home two guys tonight. I'f they won't go for a double-team you can have the lanky one.
Sexting Captain while emailing my eharmony match about my low key weekend is hard.
After we got done he told me to hold his penis because it helps him fall asleep
The exact people you expect to find at a bar at 2pm are here. Come visit. We'd really like the company.
Do you ever go take a shit and end up sitting on the toilet for like 45 minutes wondering what the fuck you're doing with your life?
Everyday my friend, everyday.
Randomize
