How do u explain cocaine to a 9 year old?
They had some plan b on the table between the beer and the guacamole. Yeah, it's gonna be a fun party.
Apparently last night drunk me put my phone in a cup of beer to make it "fun scented".
We snorted a line of cocaine and xanax, and then played a game of Backgammon. It was surprisingly therapeutic.
Just so were clear I meant the head your face is on
His personality is sparkling but nothing beats his ass
Turns out he's old enough to be my dad. I'm so excited. I've never had a sugar daddy before. What should I ask for first!? Want anything?
SHUN THE NONBELIEVERS. THUS SAYS THE NIPPLE LORD
Was i rolling around in a parking lot last night
JUST DENIED A NEW YEARS KISS BECAUSE HE WAS A COWBOYS FAN.
I walked in and saw her crying and singing to her dog
Well my parents know I get medical Cannabis they saw me on the news at the dispensary
You're not gonna like every guy whose dick I put in my mouth
It's like every time I'm baked I discover my fingers all over again.
is it still the walk of shame if his dad gave me a 'thanks for sleeping with my son' head nod on my way out this morning?
Randomize
