Donna and I are betting on whether or not you are going to cheat on your boyfriend tonight....I said you wouldnt do it.
You might as well just give her the money now.
): 100 percent naked, unless you count a tiara as clothing.
i either just walked in on pete wacking off to webmd or he was checking his dick for herpes
I tried to throw up out of my window but I forgot there was a mesh screen.
update: last drink of the night and im naked in my porch hammock. life is good.
I full on slapped a girl with pizza. Like in the face with sauce splattered everywhere and grease with a hard slap to the face.
dreams really do come true on the roof and drinking again
As we're eating sushi she goes I just want to get a disease so my mom can take care of me... Great first date
shes on the ground doing bicycle kicks screaming "is my ass good enough for you now satan" send help
I think drinking White Russians at half past four in the afternoon is perfectly acceptable. I'd bought a LOT of milk and cream that needs to be used up. Resourceful, check, fuckable, check. You have a great girlfriend here pal.
Guess who isn't pregnant with a random sex ocean baby?!?!
Chick in the reindeer getup puked on Baby Jesus last night. But then she bought us all empanadas so she's cool.
is it too soon to tell him I'm available anytime for Christmas themed pity sex and I'll even wear a Santa hat?
so third time im replacing the batteries on my vibrator in 2 months #sosingle....on another note though, black beauty is raring to go
I think one make out session at a bar per year is probably the best choice.
Randomize
