Great date with Damon, but I'm not sure if telling him I like lesbian porn is a good second date discussion.
the girl in my class has a rolling backpack and just told it to stay. im too hungover for this.
Hey couldn't find water bottle to put margs in whole bottle in purse gonna stop and get cups and ice from starbucks and burrito from una mas want a quesadilla
You kept hugging the big bouncer & feeling the other ones beard
They're putting plan B in vending machines now. My life just got so much easier.
And I kind of want to stare at skinny jonah hill like a weird zoo exhibit lol.
We spent a good 10 minutes in the morning looking for my clothes. I ended up taking the bus home in my 6inch heels and his baggy t-shirt. The bus was filled with kids... one of them whistled at me.
I flashed some kids doing a church car wash. I feel like I really improved the quality of their lives.
I cried at the bouncer while saying I wished he was my father... They had no idea what to do with me.
Get in your clown car, pick up everyone you know, and head to the park. drunk Sledding grand prix tonight. winner takes home the leftover beer
Hold on... Are we having an intellectual conversation about porn?
Yup
I love us.
who orders an old fashioned in 2014? even my Grandparents think you're an asshole.
He told me that if he broke my bed my bed durring sex he would take me to ikea, but only on Monday because it's all you can eat meatballs. I think I'm in love.
a guy just skateboarded past my window in a bunny suit while chased by a dog walker
Turns out I screen transfered my streaming trucker restroom porn vid to the downstairs neighbors'TV instead of my own, damn you chromecast
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