did you get engaged???
have you ever noticed that homeless people never have acne. suck it proactive
Actually, all he talks about is how great the sex is with her and how crappy you were at it. Stop being a bitch and gossiping masking it as self-righteousness.
Just deleted any ex boyfriends and potential lovers from my phone in preparation for Vegas...
That was the first time I have seen a confused expression with a dick in the mouth
Seriously? What part of meeting at Oktoberfest while I'm wearing a dirndl, double fisting, and making out with random guys screams "i'm girlfriend material"?!
If you're receiving this text it's probably because I drunkenly flashed you on Saturday. Sorry for forcing you to look at my tits. That was uncalled for.
You bought champagne and told everyone it was because I'd just found out I was pregnant. How exactly is that being a good wingman?
Want to FaceTime and watch me finish this bagel?
First sunburned tits of the season. And it's only April... I feel like it's going to be a good summer.
Drugs are gluten free tho, right?
I snorted xanax while wearing reindeer antlers. Prancer gone wild. Have a merry Christmas.
I didn't even mind that he came early I just wanted to get eaten out and cuddle
I mean you're asking high Chelsea. I'd sell myself for a rice crispy
so evidently blowing a guy does not mean he will say hi to you when he sees you in class.. in case you're ever wondering
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