i think beer pong is the only time ive ever found a use for geometry
Now there's vomit covered trash all over the front lawn. I feel accomplished
There should be a blender full of rum, tea, and grape jelly in the freezer. She thought it was a good idea until she blew chunks.
it's gotten to the point where there are no existing good choices. even our good choices are bad choice by anyone's standards but ours.
time for you to cut the loving, understanding, non-judgmental crap and say/do whatever it takes to make sure I never, ever, ever sleep with him again ever
so I am that guy with the red solo cup in class. someone has to step it up.
My dick can't jump between your dick and her mouth, man. It's impossible, I think.
Hey, you remember years ago when you told me you would give me a kidney?
I'm basically flying you out for a long weekend of sex and going to the zoo
I'm cool with that
Would you like to partake in getting high as fuck with your best friend and then proceeding to cry over the shit head guys we deal with?
Thanks for letting me pee on your bed and cry about nothing to you. You're a real friend
my bed is a shrine, and I am its goddess.
Don’t fucking talk to that dude from monday!! Ethical consumption dude, don’t fuck shitty guys
Who knew she had talents apart from chugging wine spritzers
So, just how hungover are you?
Not at all, surprisingly.
That has to be your X-Men power.
Randomize
