:O -> O: ... that's emoticon for "he threw up in my mouth while we were making out"
she just gave me a present from you... on a stripper pole. in front of the whole club. :)
WHY ISNT THIS A PICTURE MESSAGE
they shut off the water. shaving my legs with soda. that desperate.
Hi. I probably already told you this mid puke, but thanks again for babysitting me last night. How did I get in the car?
My roommate threw his shoe through our window and I came out of my blackout kicking holes in my wall. Pretty sure Edward 80 Hands won't be happening anymore.
you looked at me, pointed to a car and silently said "the elephant parks here".
Why did you come into my room last night at 3am and pour monopoly money on me while you were crying?
He came in both my eyes, then refused to give me a towel unless I found him by playing Marco Polo
20 bottles of wine, 3 cases or beer, and 5 bottles in my kitchen... My parents are teasing me.
people in the room actually applauded when we discovered you had the ability to somehow throw up on your own back
that almost beats the chick I saw smoking a joint while uni-cycling past my house at 4am. Almost.
I gave him blue balls & ate the last slice of pie so the chances of a second date are slim...
tbh i just wanted to fuck a guy with forearm tattoos but then he was so FORWARD about it
Is there a single word to describe 'the last guy she slept with before meeting her husband'? Cause there should be.
i smell like vinegar and tequila i can feel the old people behind me judging
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