I just had the ultimate walk of shame. I'm barefoot, in his gym short with vomit in my hair and I walked half a mile through campus. At noon. Thanks for picking up ur phone
Bank of America texted me 7 times in 12 hours to say my balance was below $50. I kept transfering money back in. Then I texted my bank saying that it was okay, i knew what I was doing.
found a rock and smashed the sliding glass door. home safe. screen door is locked so we're good.
I accidentally got a lemon stuck in your bong. I was trying to make it taste good. Sorry
I'm having Vietnam flashbacks. This Kid I hooked up with is speaking in class and I keep experiencing the terror.
attractive or not, he has more than one book on serial killers. i'm gonna get out of here while i can
Fucking her would be like seeing big foot, finding a four leaf clover , petting a unicorn, and arm wrestling a leprechaun in a matter of a 6 hour period
All three shower stalls were filled with couples fucking and then someone yelled "switch" and... We switched
I still count it as showing your tits. Even though the wall was the only one who saw anything. Your boyfriend was pissed.
He almost got to me tonight but then I was like fuck it I'm going to dance with a teli-tubby on the bar so fuck you
"You can go raw dog up in me". Exact words. I can't decide whether to run, or fuck. Help.
I hope you have a dream of a sloth with my face touching you erotically
I finally broke my dry spell. I did it. D-do-da-Dora.
WHY THE FUCK DID I HAVE TO FALL IN LOVE WITH A CONVICT
You know more about his cock specs than his childhood. Proud of you
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