Is it sad i was sitting here thinkin how i would only fuck Rob Pattinson if he was glittery at said time.
meet me or not, i'm out of control
he left me a 6 minute video of him peeling a clementine listening to justin bieber
I'm drinking bacardi out of her mom's eco-green starbucks mug and chasing it with her sister's "for track only" vitamin water. Hello suburbia
The waitress bought us a round. She said if anyone could do 52 margarita mondays in a row, it was us.
I think I'm going to make a pina klonopin before class.
Apparently I covered myself in sunscreen before I went to bed. Im just assuming that due to the fact I found an empty bottle of sunblock
Found plan b box covered with blood. In kitchen sick. Pickle jar is empty. Wtf happened?
I have been referring to it as "thanks for getting out of me day" all week. Do you think they will still take me to brunch tomorrow?
his finger was half off and he was more concerned that he wasnt at home shooting cucumbers out of his potato gun.
I sold him an eighth while trippin balls wearin my girlfriends tutu and tube top. and i was talking about albinos the entire time
well, he defiantly picked the right guy to buy drugs from
we were making out in my truck and while she was straddling me she informs me that she jerks off horses for a living. Should I be concerned or flattered?
I tried to trade my phone for pizza last night. I guess I had priorities last night
I must stop trying to make out with my friends when I'm hammered.
Also this morning I remembered seeing the stripper he threw up on later in the night. She was clothed though.
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