I just peed in my kitchenbs sinlk. New low- maybe. am i embarrassed? Not in the least
girl in the front row yawned. double jointed jaw. i know where i'll be sitting next class
If I don't have herpes this will be the single greatest day of my life
Tinkerbell just flew up to me and tickled my balls. What the fuck did we smoke?
Human Centipede: The Drinking Game. This is non-negotiable. First one to pass out the rest of us get to FEEEEED THEM!
If you wake up soonish don't worry. I took your dog to burger king and now we're going to see some nice girls.
I had to find out that I peed in the box of baby clothes from my mom, who found out from my grandma. New low.
her spring break bucket list included "break into The Swamp, blow him where Tebow has Tebowed"
Ever since the Christmas fiasco of '08, I can no longer watch Rudolf the Red nosed reindeer without getting a hard on
I know he's only a bandaid for my emotional disrepair, but he can stick me anytime!!
then I ended up getting a lapdance from my TA...I love college.
While we were doing it he looked up at me and said "Does your husband fuck you this good?" Talk about a mood killer....
Seriously if we go to rome ur fucking me into the sunset on a wrought iron balcony overlooking Vatican City
It's confirmed. I have two dates on Saturday, and they are both named Mike.
I'm gonna go take a shower so I can cleanly change into my drinking underwear.
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