And he showed us your test. You wrote what is this shit and scribbled on it? Nice 3%..
hey did I tally my arm again of # of shots?
nope, you were tallying rejections at the party
I woke up wearing nothing but 7 partially eaten candy necklaces. Only one was around my neck. Don't even try to tell me I don't need plan B.
I was wondering where I've seen this kid then I remembered I saw him doing lines of blow of his gf's leg while she was sleeping last week.
i found a twelve pack under my bed. and a six pack in my closet. I'm like a fucking alcoholic squirrel.
We raised our shot glasses and you screamed out "TO MY DAD FINALLY GOING TO REHAB!"
I will probably be peed on at some point today.
they esentially rejected my mermaid threesome offer:(
I'm allowed to be upset. I've never had that many fingers in my ass
If I come home tho and find u passed out naked in my bed with the bottle of crown empty, we're gonna have issues.
I'm sorry, I can't help the fact that I like to sleep naked, and I like booze, together it looks bad, yes.
I spilled beer everywhere which led to an oil fire and me melting a spatula again. And then I was late to class so I explained what happened to the teacher.
I found my limit. I will not, in fact, blow my 78 year old professor for an A in his class.
I just made a dick pic collage. Let me just tell you,there is no comparison to the latest!
I'm having shoppers remorse over a dildo
Guy just walked in with a 40 and a Honda steering wheel. Where the fuck am I?
Randomize
