Joe is a total sociopath, I'm going to hook up with him tonight
I am dying of drunk and no thats not a typo.
I'm such a slut...i kept having sex with him after he called me his ex gf's name. I just felt like i deserved something out of it too.
Crisis Situation. How do you have that "we probably shouldn't make out tonight cause i've got an oral herpes outbreak coming on" conversation on a third date.
Are you still giving blowjobs?
Who is this?
were trying to schedule when i can give him head in between classes.
I really couldn't tell if she was disgusted with the fact that I yacked on her shoes, or if she was about to do the same to me.
He bought me shots at the bar as his way of of paying me back for Plan B
he broke into my appartment and left me a waffle maker...
Pregnancy scare over. Let the cockfest begin.
Well I just found the most comfortable way to pass out on my toilet if I ever have to.
Its a good thing to know for upcoming events.
Sending dick pics while driving a car going 80 in the rain at night to a married woman? Why hello 2014
He made a toga out of my hot pink bed sheets and cracked an egg on his head. Then he proceeded to alphabetize our DVD collection, which was impressive because I'm 99% sure he couldn't have done that sober.
my ass is still wet. this is highly unpleasant. give me 5 to get changed and I'm all yours. or you can yell things to me while I shower and burn clothes
Dude i'm still drunk and i'm feeding a raccoon cereal from my bedroom window
Randomize
