Um, that's called prostitution
Not if I leave it on the nightstand, then it's called cab money
Some girl in the stall next to me just yelled "fuck yes i started my period!" she came out of the stall and we high fived. who am i to judge? i do that every month.
We were making out when she went into convulsions. At least now I know she's allergic to peanuts.
I'm not gonna not go for it, she's foreign and pulled a shotglass out of her thong.
We made out for three hours. Then she said she didn't sleep with redheads and left the party. So yes, I'm still drinking.
I knew I fucked up when I woke up with the meat scissors in my hand.
The worst thing about it is now I have to find someone else to fuck in the library.
All I've succeeded in doing since I saw you is drool on my shoulder
my mom snuck into my room, washed her clothes and made her breakfast. what the fuck she's a better boyfriend than I am
I'm really ok with inappropriate relationships. They are my favorite of all the relationships. No need to be timid. For crying out loud.
Listen I'm tryna celebrate your divorce. Sometimes that calls for drinking on the toilet.
You should really look at your snapstory. It has us screaming " MANSION DICK! SUCK IT! FUCK IT!" By the way im currently in a mansion and need you to pick me up
My "lord keep me from stabbing a bitch" prayer has gotten a lot of miles today
I thought I came here to hook up, not for a Study Abroad 101 session
I think my FWB just broke up with me and i don't know how I feel about that
Randomize
