the chick doesn't look like she's put anything in her mouth for weeks other than his dick.
FYI... At my funeral, it will be your job to throw yourself dramatically onto my casket.
They made my facebook status "I got my period!!!." Every guy I've had sex with at college liked it.
He choked me out. i woke up to poo. I dont think i like S&M
The theme is smores and alcohol. Dress appropriately.
I'm fucked up. I can't drink anymore. We stole a cat.
Ask him about a girl named Meg then give a disappointed and disapproving face.
Life lesson today, a six foot hot guy I meet at a party CANNOT fit on my bike with me.
yeah, i'm not. but i'm ready for free bjs. it's just hard to find women who will give me a beej while i'm sobbing uncontrollably
NO I FORBID YOU. THERE ARE BETTER VIRGINITIES OUT THERE WORTH KIDNAPPING.
How interesting! I'm adding this to my list of things to discuss with you between fucks.
I felt like in order for him to make it to mordor and destroy the ring, he'd have to make sweet sweet love to me in some form of hut or cave.
I still have your make up all over the inside of my thighs from the face sitting. Free tonight?
Apparently it's illegal to hit pedestrians with coke cans... But the cop complimented my arm. That's a win in my book.
I just found your ripped underwear on my chandelier. Care to explain?
Randomize
