Wooohooo! I'm sitting in the car like a creep watching people walk in and out of Blush. Lots of happy people.
i dont nkow, theres a guy slesping next to me and im wearing 8 tsthirts? wtf happened last night? will you come get me.
i think im in thre room next to you
I considered driving home in his mom's bathrobe until i realized i'd have to stop to buy cigarettes
she uses ice cubes and hums anything I want. Last night was Welcome to the jungle. it wasnt lost on me shes a puma. no shame in that 30+ game.
You also had the stripper slap the shit out of me for not having any money....remember that?
my text book just quoted the cookie monster
if I hooked up with that creppy kkid in bio does that count as doing charity work during the holidays?
Dude, I just scraped frozen vomit from my rooftop
I really wish I could say this is a new low for you
The biggest loser is alot easier to jack off to at the end of the season
I couldn't walk, so he carried me all the way home; and then I told him that I wasn't drunk enough to fuck him. Poor kid.
im currently assessing the tequila situation in preparation of your arrival
Sometimes i think i need to stop drinking because i can't afford losing so many panties anymore
Shia LaBeouf arrested in austin for public intoxication. JUST DO IT
I just had to explain to my grandma what a reach-around is. Too far..
We decorated the tree, drank wine, and he went down on me with Christmas music on in the background. Christmas IS coming.
Randomize
