i have a strong urge to join the asians in the park doing tai chi. I think im still high .
We didn't go..parents came home with patron wanting to play drinking games --we asked no questions
I wish they had nachos that got you drunk
were with a gay guy with a minnesota accent. think about how funny that sounds.
literally the only thing you kept saying was "i wish i had a beer keg vending machine that accepted hugs as payment" and everytime you said it you rubbed the urn her grandmother's remains were in
my boss told me he would look for my wallet when he went back to the strip club tonight.
im not even sure if i fucked her just woke up in her closet.
Finally put clothes on I've been laying naked in the bed for approximately 4 hours since I showered and by showered I mean when I laid down in the bathtub with the shower on
She was moaning so loud as i walked out of the room her roommates gave me a standing ovation... i think they are next
We are such grown women, dealing with life's problems one shower beer and reckless makeout session at a time.
Only great wives bring your dope to you when you are at the Cardiologist
I paper cut my nipple reading mail topless
I've got 3 hot dudes surrounding me. It's the Bermudick Triangle.
How high are you rn
Well I just ate a cheesecake straight from the box with a fork and now I’m laying upside down in a recliner chair seeing if I can Uber eats Doritos
So not that high
I woke up alone, naked in her bed staring at a lifesize poster of edward cullen,actually I'm lying I did have socks on
Randomize
