Thank God they found balloon boy, I was afraid that Michael Jackson was ordering take out from heaven.
If it's any consolation, your boobs looked awesome.
Walt I've been the third wheel taking shotssssssssssssssssolo. Each s is for each solo shot.
I think I saw maybe 3 ugly girls the entire time we were there
Yea its like that frat house was built to keep fat chicks out of parties
Yea... you were given too many get out of jail free cards. God just gave up on you having a healthy and happy vagina.
In conversation she brought up that she slept with Tucker Max on the UF football field
Dance move was taxi-ing on the runway then taking off in a plane. All the boys wanted to beat you up cause they were like "who is this angel flapping her arms like a bird in the bar i must have her"
It's a "party harder or raise your standards" kind if night.
How long can I keep it classy to hook up in my old office building? Two more years? Does it get weird after 30?
I feel like I should treat myself every time I find out I'm not pregnant. Is there a pie company that delivers??
Haha idk you were stealing pizza dough at dominos
There's glitter all over his bed from my Pink VS panties... I think I might invest in similar styles as a way of marking my territory just incase.
That was the most spiritually awakened shit I have ever taken.
Get over your kidney infection all ready. You have been sober for too long.
That man makes my giblets tingle
Congrats? I think?
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