talk about how much treatments for your hpv hurts
Well maybe next time you won't tell me to do whatever I want.
Just got walked in on during safety inspections
Think you passed?
i dont even know how to be here
There's an Captain Planet marathon because of Earth Day. I can't NOT turn this into a drinking game.
Let me start this apology by saying you were the finest piece of ass I ever had.
He threw up in a cup in the limo and when he got out the bouncer told him he couldn't bring drinks in so he gave the glass to that dumb girl we brought with us from c street.
I know, she tried to drink it
Believe me. As soon as the boss man is out the door. I am on my way to wow your vagina with my horse-like attributes.
Drunk texting with my high school teacher. This hurricane is bringing out the best in everyone!
btw im having a "its finally warm enough for a bbq in Toronto" party tonight. bring all the alcohol you have. and hamburger buns.
I'm sorry I never said I wasn't coming home last night. To my defense I did type and send a text, only I was too drunk to realize I sent it to the guy I was with instead of you.
He had a flex off with himself in the mirror but he thought it was someone else for at least 20minutes.
Just because your drunk doesn't mean you can stick your dick in the snow. Just a FYI
it's like i'm your dad, but instead of reminding you to bring your lunch to school i remind you to take a good long hit from your bong.
I'm, like, this 🤏🏼 close to buying crocs
And you're also 🤏🏼 to never putting your dick inside me again
Randomize
