it feels good to walk into a CVS and not go straight to the pharmacy counter for plan b. its been a while....
The musician playing at the bar just puked inside his acoustic guitar, then sang an encore performance. I love Louisa!!!!
he was drinking wine. Puking into an empty water bottle. And eating french toast. ....All at the same time.
Found crayons in my cigarette pack. I can't help but feel you may be responcible.
Shes 18 and still has a curfew. it was great. didnt have to worry about her still being here in the morning.
My brain is like scrambled eggs. If scrambled eggs were trying to escape out of my skull through my forehead.
God dammit not the cupcake channel. Not when I'm high.
You get home okay?
I'm pantless and in bed
That doesn't mean you're at home.
It will be interesting
Isn't that your life's motto?
Only you could make a reflective vest look even remotely sexy
I had a sex dream about Fox Mulder, and the Royals just won the World Series. My life is complete.
I CAN SPEAK THE LANGUAGE OF THE ANIMES.
I drank all the wines... and all th Doritos. Whilst watching Fat Camp. I need to reassess my values.
Which one have i been cheating ON and which one have i been cheating WITH if i met them the same night & have been dividing time equally?
I have decided that I would still fuck Harrison Ford even though he is old as fuck now. Do you think it would kill him?
Most likely. But I bet he'd do a bang up job of it before he died.
He absolutely would.
Randomize
