yo my bday is less then one week away. hope youve found another annoying candian i can lick dairy products off of. also sorry about your loss
Turns out "bordello" doesn't mean what I thought it did.
The last thing I remember is funneling tequila out of a pink noodle.
If him repeating sorry while thrusting isn't makeup sex than I don't know what else is
Please do NOT set off the smoke alarm when I am tied to the bed like this...
How can he have such a manly penis and baby hands?!
she left around the point i tried to tie her hair around my dick
I get off at the next exit which doesn't have a shoulder, a guy is riding my ass so I cant stop. I think I got as much puke on his car as on mine.
i had a threesome. one of the guys used to bully me in high school too for being gay.
No, we got so into acting out our role play characters we didn't even fuck. still sucess.
We are no longer allowed to have pre 4th party week. I woke up with a donut stuck to my face and 'MILF' written in black marker on my stomach.
Mother of the Year
It was Thanksgiving sex. I was thankful for it. Need I say more?
There is a pool of ranch salad dressing in my purse...I know thats always been something you've wanted to try..so don't even act like you didn't do this.
Good news, finally found someone who remembers Saturday night. Bad news, everyone in the bar saw your penis
idk what the male equivelent of vajazzling is but it better be worth the time
Randomize
