It went from cuddling and watching blood diamond to watching the three of them snort an entire $80 bag of blow off the coffee table
Buying Plan B right after a lecture on feminism. It's nice to know who I can thank for that right.
It was actually pretty good. His cock is as fat as the rest of him and I took out my contacts so I couldn't see him clearly.
You can't find true love with Budweiser and a futon
KETAMINE SUNDAYS ARE SERIOUSLY FUCKING ME UP!
im starting to recognize places in this city by where i have drunkenly peed in public
We dared each other to drink Arbor Mist, and I waterboarded someone with tequila.
Also, just had a student offer to sell me Xanax. Want some? Just for like a rainy day. Or our memorial day shitshow. Or just another Wednesday night.
She refuses to believe she pulled down her pants and spanked her ass in front of us
I'm going to fuck every single member of the men's olympic swimming team and no one is going to stop me
After your flask fell out of your leg brace and you told your RA that it was juice, you tried to unlock your dorm room but your key was attached to your bra so he ended up seeing your boobs
My life has come to reading articles about dating an ex heroin addict. I'm doing well.
You ever sit back and realize our friendship is based off us ranting at each other with random animal photos thrown in
No i dont need a babysitter i have my cats. Cats can dial 911 ya know
Should I give the penis ring toss game to good will or garbage
Randomize
