your profile still reads that you like women...interesting? I think there is some photography and video that will show otherwise
I love being friends with rich people. I get laid by association.
Encyclopedia Brown and the case of the missing condom.
I hope Brown isn't a clue to its whereabouts.
there is this woman at the counter who looks identical to linda ellerbee. and she's grinning. COME. INSIDE. NOW.
If Andre Agassi did Crystal Meth, what was John McEnroe doing?
I'd steal beers with my tail. If I were a monkey.
I got a hennah tattoo of my room number on my arm...I love spring break in Mexico!
It's like a squid of pain has attached to my head and it spreading it's whorey tentacles all over.
Really? Uh ohh sounds like a double date with extra stripper funnnn
2 girls slept in my bed with me. 3 more girls slept on a mattress on my floor. The furthest I got was cuddling. Here's my man card.
I just picked up my phone and one shoe from the man mowing the lawn next to the ice rink. He found them in a tree.
My dream date: Hotdogs/nachos from the bar & tequila. Is that too much to ask?
The dominoes guy came back thirty mins later to ask me out. I guess he figures if I'm eating pizza alone I must have gotten dumped
I have an interview tomorrow! The couple we regularly swing with said I could use them as references. Winning
You have to just make a conscious effort not to make out with people when he's around if you want to keep him in your life?
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