I just got three quarters of the way there before I realized I was way too stoned for class so I bought a smoothie and walked home.
Dude..TWLOHA day. gonna write LOVE on my arms before going to the bar tonight. its like a pussy guarantee.
So i think we're being coned into a threesome with the promise of pokemon
Why do you apologize after every time we have sex?
im gonna put my furry chinchilla vagina on her mother effing nose
I had the spins so badly it was like I was having sex with 2 girls
Well look at it this way, if he should happen to get into a terrible accident within the next 2 days, its okay.. i have his dental records on my ass cheek.
That's like being smoked out by a unicorn. If the opportunity presents itself you fucking do it and don't ask questions.
Judging by the fact that he asked me if i wanted to serenade him using cocaine and Taylor Swift I'd say I so have it in the bag.
I think there's a website warning girls about me based on the 4 who approached me separately tonight and called me evil. Fuckyoudave.com?
The drunk people on this bus are singing Journey songs. This is the whitest thing I've ever experienced
Well, if it makes you feel any better I'll be drinking tequila and doing lines on Halloween. Just like old days.
So why are your hands bright blue and have you seen my roommate.
Both questions will answer each other.
I may be a complete scumbag but even im not willing to spend a grand and sit on a plane for 24 hours just for shrooms and a blowjob
How is there a hawk inside this house? More importantly how the hell is he handling it without any gear?
Randomize
