Dude it was awful. I woke up with more strippers in my dorm room than those duke lacrosse kids.
I just got wrote up for "repeatedly smelling like alcohol"
That was long passed due.
I can't wait to get all this Makers out of my shoe.
I looked at her and said "I now pronounce you pumpkin tits"
I just wiped my face with a slice of bread. Lowest point of the night.
Theres been so much buildup for our genitals to meet, one or both of us is sure to be disappointed.
Yours weakened by children. Mine weakened by a forearm sized cock for 8 years.
She is the absolute last thing I would want to screw. Honestly. Fellating a porcupine. Higher on the list.
I really want to fuck that guy in the full wind breaker suit
I'm smoking a bowl with matches and a candle while my mother washes dishes downstairs. I thought adulthood was supposed to be different.
I was walking out the front door and heard his roomate say "It looks like you need a chiropractor." I think my work here is done.
Yeah, we agreed, but I feel like I need at least one more ride on the bonecoaster
ditto.
about cumming, not toast
Does the girl you just banged want anything from Taco Bell?
I no longer have the means to support both a women and an alcohol addiction
Randomize
