nothing tight i'm going to stuff myself with food and alchy
Dude WTF? His teammate just started talkin to me on fb! Am I walking around with a "I like to f**k gators" on my forehead?
No, it just says ur easy
He sang nursery rhymes to my vagina to get me to have sex with him..
in light of our recent drunken behavior, i think it's time we seriously consider hiring ourselves a babysitter.
when I sang my humps to you I meant it.
Sometimes familiar penis is best. Its like comfort food for your vagina.
I accidentally got a lemon stuck in your bong. I was trying to make it taste good. Sorry
So much rum. So many feels.
it's too much effort for something that isn't food.
I just bout myself an edible arrangement for myself and had it delivered to work. I even wrote myself a note. This is a new low for me.
of fours songebofy did dknt stop believing
how legible are my texts
You know its a good morning when you wake up with blonde hair extensions in your pocket. . .
are you still up? I want to use you for sexual things. you have 35 minutes to respond to this offer.
We fucked on the roof... like that has to mean something
Im bringing my light up rubber ducky just in case we end up at a rave tonight. HE CHANGES COLOR!
Randomize
