So why didn't Edward and the Cullens just kill Hitler?
You need to stop watching Twilight.
i now know how you feel when you have to walk me home. she ran into a streetlight and into garbage.
And then he said "good night girls" and kissed each one before I put my shirt back on
Hit a parked car with a "property of Jesus Christ" bumper sticker. Wrote out five hail mary's and left it on the windshield.
Getting too drunk for the hot dog vendor to serve me is possibly a sign of an alcohol problem. I threw up in the sewer grates next to his stand
He referred to his cock as "The cock" like it was third party or something.
I'm sorry. But when a stripper driving a Bentley tells me I have potential..... I gotta at least listen to her proposal. God did not mean for me to waste these tits on law school.
I'm having mini little movies in my head. Like for example. You were talking to a blue whale with jazz man sunglasses, but not the ray charles jazz sunglass. More like sunglasses that are round. Anyway, he has a baguette and stupid french hat. And you , you had your harry potter glasses.
THE ALMIGHTY HAS FALLEN DRUNKENLY OFF HIS HIGH HORSE AND INTO HOLLY'S VAGINA
She was drunk and naked on our couch, sweating and masterbating to SNL. We made eye contact and she didn't even stop. It's new-roommate-o-clock
He passed out in the car on the way to the party. Seabiscuit tripped before the race even started....Lil bitch....
You pretty much lost your mind. Your ego has gotten ten time the size of your balls.
Just had sex in the room next to my parents. Heading back to school ASAP.
Also, I had mind-blowing sex on a pool table
one week and then i'm back on the sexual grind. a party is being planned in my vagina's honor
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