Kenny Powers is just a normal guy with exceptional hair
I just farted in the dogs face to show him who's boss
he asked me if i had ever jacked off high and then referred to it as a "man-to-man question"
He just randomly started talking about Haiti and Conan O'Brien and his grandpa's hip replacement operation. It was the worst phone sex I've ever had.
Shark Week. Kick off begins Sunday. The drinking game has been upgraded to include jumping/breaching sharks and Jake's not allowed to bring the harpoon. Period.
I may have just flashed my roommate as he walked in while my towel was falling. Now he knows what an American sized penis looks like I suppose
I think it really helped to be hungover at accepted students day. it gave me a good feel for how it would be everyday if I go there.
I told you alcohol was flammable, but you didn't believe me until you tried to extinguish your sparkler by submerging it in vodka and the bottle burst into flames.
Come over. We're getting stoned and watching DogTV
We were having a serious discussion about Blue's Clues and I just kept thinking, 'you've seen me naked'.
Apparently I drunkenly agreed to help the homeless. For once, I'm not disappointed in drunk me. Four for you, drunk self. You go, drunk self!
Well, I'll handle this like I always do. Black the fuck out, make out with randoms, give out my number like candy. You know. Standard operating procedure
Did you wake up next to Karina?
So that's her name
I just talked comic books with a cop. We high-fived as he was running my name.
Proud of you.
We discussed the legality of being a vigilante. I won.
Do u believe in the possibility of big foot?
You high??
Randomize
