Ben affleck wants to be a US senator. Just thought you would puke with me
she looked like she should be chained to micheal vicks radiator
hey can i play with your boom stick tonite? I'll let you shoot the love of jesus in my face.
come over
the day after is always just damage control
At what point last night did I start ordering doubles?
Right after we had the just friends talk..
So currently I have a block of cheese duct taped to my air conditioner in lieu of a fridge.
What happened to "I wouldnt even touch her with a ten foot pole"?
Her vagina devoured it.
The forest. Magic mushrooms. Wind trees leaves sky. That is alll.
Trust me at the end of the night there will be queso smothered places you didn't think it could be smothered
The bald eagles cry cause u drink canadian beer.
If I had that in my pants Omg I would want a shirt made so everyone knew
I sewed up my pants, stole his girlfriends white shirt, and went to work hungover like a responsible adult.
My husband has seen you naked more times this week than me. I don't consider it a bad thing since you keep bringing the booze to our house. And because my tits are bigger.
Welp... sober this am and I still have a parrot.
I didn't rip your fishnets, WE ripped your fishnets.
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