oh good, I think they're gone
the painters?
my herpes
If I had a penis I would totaly hang shit off it. Like stretched out peach rings and fruit rollups.
We walked in and found his glass coffee table broken and you in the bathroom throwing up saying "What a bad first impression."
Just remember that she is a giant dick-sucking forehead and you are better than that.
I was to drunk to walk in jimmy john's so I called and got a pickle delivered to me outside the bar , too much?
Do you have any idea how hard it is to hit on your nurse while getting an HIV test.
Well since its impossible for me to swallow a pill this big I'm making wine slushies out of them
So glad I decided to show up and puke in your trashcan.
These are the moments that bond souls forever.
she came back from her house with A paper cut , a 2liter of sprite with Bacardi , and half a mustache . we're inviting her more ofte
BURNT NIPPLES ARE UNHAPPY NIPPLES.
Not my type, but the penis looks fun.
We should buy t shirt guns and blow eggs out of them at his house. Bachelorette party
Just so you know, it is really hard to rehydrate when everything is spiked with everclear.
I'm always down for nudity.
Must lick fork, like it's a DICK
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