...So a 6 ft tall drag queen in heels I would kill for just told me I have a dunkable ass. I'm confused...but I'll take any compliment I can.
Maybe if you date her you can take a dump on her
I'm the only kid serving jury duty. And I'm the only one who may walk out of here in handcuffs for a warrant. I'm enabling these people to doubt America's youth once again.
You didn't want to have sex last night because you said your grandpa just died and you didn't want him watching..
I'm not sure, 7-8, the last bit was a rush of at least three blended together. Basically you fucked me so stupid that I can't even recall the number of orgasms.
So you know, I'm making that my facebook status.
I'm sorry I ignored your high cries for help while you were grating cheese on my dog.
I'm looking for mother nature. And when I find her, I'm looking her right in the eyes and telling her to fuck off.
As part of the off-hours team building exercises, I had my new coworkers figure out to push me back to the hotel from the nearby bars in a shopping cart every night for a week.
I just encountered the same creepy guy I showed you, he jumped inside the dumpster screaming.
your fridge is broken, your sock drawer is full of snow, and you flipped off the whole stadium on the big screen. I'd say it went well.
Good news. That bum you thought that died is alive.
I don't need you anyway! I have puppies and booze!
It takes a special friend to go vibrator shopping with
Yes. It does.
In an unrelated matter, im gonna eat you out so much later.
Remember when you tried to talk but you could only count by 2s?
Randomize
