Unmistakable female orgasm noises coming from upstairs shower
She must've brought a toy -- seriously doubt that he's up to the task
you ever fart during an orgasm? feels like u just lost 10 pounds
Most sexually ambiguous night of my life. Kept switching from the NBA finals to the Tonys.
i feel like this needs to be a 'lose some teeth' kind of weekend.
She made out with the kickboxers bf. She was just asking to get kicked in the head. In the middle of the bar.
I just peed in a flower pot on the veranda while crying and holding a drink
Yes stubble LOOKS hot but factor in his shitty bj skills and I might as well have jacked off with apricot scrub
I ran into my boss at the liquor store on our lunch hour we both just stood there awkwardly until i was like your car bar or mine hahaha we both need a cab
Just applied for assistance with paying my hospital bill from my alcohol poisoning at age 16 while still a little drunk from last night. What is my life.
Circle of life?
I really care about you, but im still gonna have to make you pay for dinner from the pain and suffering in my knees and vagina.
If one of us has to be polite I guess I won't sneak out while he's in the shower
Well, at some point in her life every girl has to decide how much weird she's willing to tolerate for hot tall banker cock
Your sister just admitted to being a " much bigger bitch" than you. So you've got that going for you, which is nice.
tell him if he brings over dinner you might let him see your left boob...or right, whichever you prefer. But under no circumstances do you let him see both...unless he brings a good desert...like coffee ice cream or something
You are, as of last night, the self declared king of pooping. Long may you reign.
Randomize
