Bisexual people are plain selfish.
i realized boys travel in groups of 3's and girls travel in 4's..thats why it gets so tricky
like hot dogs and buns.
In mid-threesome, need more condoms. Wearing a sheet to the gas station. I'll keep you posted
it is a toga and you are a goddess.
Besides asking our teacher if he enjoyed being fisted did I have any other tragic moments last night?
I couldn't get past the raccoon on my porch so i slept on my lawn.
Throwing up in the car while my mom drives, sister holds the bag & my dad holds my hair. This is how my family bonds.
but they dont look like handprints. looks like someone had a boxing match with my tits and my tits lost
It was so cute that he apologized for getting cum on my couch. If he realized how many guys had cum on that couch in the past year, he wouldn't have touched my vagina with a 10-ft pole.
Is it bad that I'm a 32 year old woman that is so afraid of commitment that a hamster is too much responsibility?
We got banned from that Whataburger for life. WHATABURGER. Which is saying something. They deal with drunk dumbasses every night.
Tequila happens.
So, just saw a lady hysterically sobbing in a Walmart at 3 AM. Someone's not having a happy mother's day.
Vodka and cigarettes aside, my body is a temple.
He gave me a box of cheez-its after sex, does that make me a hooker?
His phone started ringing when we were pulled over and he said 'hold on, this is most likely more important than you', proceeded to answer it and agree to work sunday, then hung up, looked at the cop and told him to continue.
Lesbians just stole my cat :(
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